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The New Natural, Recovering From A Loss

  • Posted on March 9, 2015 at 8:24 am

It has been written that 95% of our daily behaviors are habits by the time we are age 35.  We have been accumulating habits from our parents, teachers, friends, social groups, social media and our personal experiences.  When you drive to work on a daily basis, you tend to take the same route and sometimes wonder how you got there?  When a traffic accident occurs, all of a sudden you have to put on your “thinking cap” and figure out an alternate driving route.  These habits save us from being constantly overloaded with decision making choices.  E.g. Should I eat an egg for breakfast, French toast, or grab a box of cereal?  You will probably realize we tend to eat the same thing for breakfast, because we are barely awake.

Our habits also give us security and a sense of routine in our life.  When we lose a job, break up with our loved one, or a loss of a loved one, we find we are feeling lost or missing a part of our normal routine of greeting a co-worker or loved one at home.

In loss of a loved one, we lose our natural rhythm of coming home to see that person who welcomes you home on a daily basis.  We miss the kiss “hello”, having to someone ask how was your day, miss having to share a meal, or just having someone in the house.

In my divorce, I missed having someone who loved me and being part of a couple.  I missed the sharing and being a family unit to face the constant joys and trials of daily living.  I missed having someone to do things with, buy gifts for, and to spoil with special meals.  Someone asked me, what home meant to me?  I answered that sitting home peacefully watching TV with my husband and cat, was what home meant to me.

Sudden loss such as a break up, divorce or a death of a spouse feels liked your current life just had the rug pulled out from underneath you.  New feelings of shock, denial, anger, acceptance and moving on all become a healing process. When I got divorced in 1992, I felt like I was on “constant overwhelm” with questions.  How am I going to live without him?  How am I going to support the style of living I have?  Now, I have to quit working for my husband, and find a new job.  I never lived alone, how am I going to deal alone with the running of the house?  How am I going to date again and will I ever trust to marry again?  I went into a swirl of anxiety and feeling lost in all the unknowns.  I didn’t sleep well.  I woke up angry and exhausted.  It was draining to go to work and be so tired.  I was so tired of feeling unsettled, being afraid of my future, and my loss of peace in my life.

In 2001, I discovered the field of “Energy Kinesiology”, where energetically you can balance out your energy blockages caused by your anxieties and fears from your past. I had my first balance and left feeling calmer and things didn’t bother me as much.  I began to realize that a 1 ½-2 hour session could change the repetitive thoughts of insecurities, fears and my behavior.  I no longer woke up anxious all the time.  Over the years, I worked on balancing many issues of feeling insecure, lacking self -confidence, releasing bondage from my Mom, allowing success in to my life, etc…

I have been studying and working in the field of “energy kinesiology” for the last 14 years.  In my kinesiology work, I often use protocols on my clients of balancing self-limiting beliefs and “cutting negative energetic cords” to their loved ones, friends, co-workers, etc…  Negative energetic cords are energetic cords that a person consciously or unconsciously sends out to you and holds on that no longer serve you in the present.  These kinesiology techniques helps you let go of your past negative stuff you are carrying around with you.  After having one of these energy balancing sessions, you feel lighter and more hopeful.  These sessions help you move through your own personal healing crisis more quickly and with less stress, so you can find your “New natural rhythm” of your life.  Why carry negative energetic burdens from your past in to the next phase of your joyful life?  Why poison a potential new relationship with fears of being hurt again?  Energy kinesiology is not a replacement for psychotherapy, however I find it decreases the stress and blockages of the situation, so you can calmly talk about and process what happened with your therapist.  I am thankful, I have a skill that helps me through my stressful times in my life and helps me move forward with hope and joy!

Anxiety word cloud on white background.

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  • Posted on April 7, 2014 at 10:02 am

Have you ever wondered why you feel anxious or stressed out when you have to make a decision?  Do some of your friends, family, or co-workers think you are a “wuss”?  Are you always balancing “in the middle”, afraid of the consequences of your decision making or feel you always have to be “right” or to “be perfect”?

Some decision makers have to gather or need more information about the question on hand.  Some decision makers have to ask a lot of other people’s opinions, before they make a qualified decision.  Some decision makers make decisions spontaneously, intuitively and do by “feeling their gut instinct”.  Which type of decision maker are you?

Have you ever met someone who no matter how much information or help you give, cannot feel secure committing to a viewpoint.  This type of person appears to be “spinning” and getting nowhere fast.  As you pressure this person, he/she gets anxious, nervous and eventually will cry or get angry at you for trying to pin them down.

As an “Energy Kinesiology practitioner” (This system is based on the Chinese Meridian system from Traditional Chinese Medicine), we say this person may have an “incongruent belief” or “conflicted” belief system.  In kinesiology, we use “muscle testing” e.g.  Testing of both arms as a biofeedback indicator of the body’s biocomputer or as I like to say, the body’s wisdom.

Let’s use the goal statement, “I can make a good decision”.  When there is anxiety or stress while saying this statement, when pressure is applied to both arms to push down, they both go weak.  If the arm muscles stay strong, there is no stress on saying that statement.

So what happens, if you say, “I can make a good decision” and your arms go down, and then you say, “I cannot make a good decision”, and your arms go down?  This is called a “negative conflict” statement.  Your subconscious cannot tell the difference.  Whether you state your goal in the positive or negative tense, it always will be negative to you.  When a person has this conflicted behavior pattern, they get caught in a loop that one cannot get out of and they “spin”.  Imagine that your thought is like a pin ball that keeps bouncing all over the place, and cannot find the way out.  In one of the “Integrated Healing” kinesiology protocols that I use, I can help unblock the client’s chakras, and they will be able to get out of that circular loop.

Imagine that clearing a few blocked energy points in your energy field can help you “discern about making a good decision”!  After I have helped unblocked the energy points, I repeat the muscle test and find that when the client says, “I can make a good decision”, both of the tested arms remain strong.  When I have the client says, “I cannot make a good decision”, both of the tested arms go weak.  Now this client can discern the difference between the two statements, thus eliminating the “spinning”.  My clients feel a decrease of anxiety when they now say the original goal.  Energy balancing is so rewarding when you see your client’s face relax and leave happy!

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